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Journal of the First Lady

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2nd November 2004

1:46pm: From my satellite Internets on Air Force One
To celebrate the election, here is a survey for all y'all!

Worlds Longest Survey

LAST PERSON WHO....
Slept in your bed: George
Saw you cry: Condoleezza
Made you cry: John Kerry
Spent the night at your house: Ed Gillespie
You shared a drink with: Barbara and Jenna
You went to the movies with: Barbara Bush Sr. on First Ladies' Night Out
You went to the mall with: Clarence Thomas
Yelled at you: George
Sent you an e-mail: Debra Massengill of Ohio
You kissed: Wouldn't you like to know!

HAVE YOU EVER....
Said "I love you" and meant it?: Of course!
Gotten in a fight w/your dog/cat/bird/fish,etc.: Yesterday, Barney peed on my new carpet!
Been to New York?: Yes, last week
Been to Florida?: Yes, today!
California?: Yep!
Hawaii?: Of course
Mexico?: About a month ago
China?: Once with George
Canada?: I hate those Frenchies!
Danced naked?: Only when I'm drunk!
Dreamed something really crazy and then it happened the next day: I dreamed that Georgie won the election in 2000!
Wish you were the opposite sex?: Only when Dick makes me really hot!
Had an imaginary friend?: I had dinner with her last night!

RANDOM
Red or blue?: Red for Republican!
Spring or fall?: Spring rhymes with bling, which is what I like!
Last noise you heard?: George just farted really loudly on AF1!
Last time you went out of the state: Today!
Things you like in a girl/guy?: A guy who can hold his alcohol and talk smooth, and one who looks great in a flight suit!
Do you have a crush on someone?: LOL I'm the First Lady!
What book are you reading now?: Some book called The Prince by a guy named Michael Velli or something.
Worst feeling in the world: Losing
What is the first thing you think when you wake in the morning?: I have to pee!
How many rings before you answer?: Depends on if they're diamond or ruby.
Future daughter's name: Lynne!
Future son's name: George
If you could have any job you wanted, what would it be?: First Lady again!
Are you a lefty, righty or ambidextrous?: Yes!
Do you type with your fingers on the right keys?: If they make the letters I want, they're the right keys!
What's under your bed: Jimmy Hoffa ROFL!
Current Age: 58
Siblings: No
Location: Crawford, TX
Piercings: Just three
Boyfriend/Girlfriend: Does George count?

THE EXTRA STUFF...
Do you do drugs?: Not since the 90s!
Do you drink?: When I can convince George to have some Miller High Life with me.
Who is your best friend?: Charlton Heston
What kind of Shampoo and Conditioner do you use?: Paul Mitchell
What are you most scared of?: Michael Moore!
What clothes do you sleep in?: My birthday suit, custom-taylored!
Who is the last person who called you?: Tom Collins
Where do you want to get married?: My wedding was in Texas, which is how it should be!
If you could change anything about yourself what would that be?: I wish my boobs weren't so saggy. :(
Who do you really hate?: Teresa Heinz-Kerry.
Been In Love?: Yep!
What Type Automobile Do You Drive: I don't drive, I take the Presidential vehicles everywhere! Besides, my driving record isn't spotless. :(
Are You Timely Or Always Late: Always prompt!
Do You Have A Job: Being George's wife is a full-time job!
Do You Like Being Around People: Sure, unless they're those nasty Liberals.
Are you for world peace: Si vis pacem, para bellum!
Are you a health freak: Somewhat.

STUFF...
Have you ever liked someone you had no chance with: Kofi broke my heart.
Have You Ever Cried Over Something Someone of The Opposite Sex Did: Yes I have.
Do You Have A "Type" Of Person You Always Go After: I luuuuuurv politicians!
Want Someone You Don't Have Right Now: Of course not!
Ever Liked a close boy/Girl Friend: Yes, when I was 17.
Are You Lonely Right Now: Not at all!
Ever Afraid You'll Never Get Married: Hahahaha silly question!
Do You Want To Get Married: Not again!
Do You Want Kids: I'd love more chilluns!

FAVORITE...
Room In house: The Presidential bedchambers, hee hee!
Song: Anything by ABBA, or that great song "E'rbody in Da Club"
Memory: November 2, 2000!
Day Of The Week: Friday
Month: September, when the weather is nice in Texas
Season: Autumn

IN THE LAST 48 HOURS, HAVE YOU....
Cried: Not yet.
Bought Something: A big foam "#1" finger for the campaign!
Gotten Sick: I'm a little bit queasy from all this flying.
Sang: Yes, "Row, Row, Row Your Boat"
Said I Love You: Yes
Wanted To Tell Someone You Loved them: I did, and I did!
Met Someone New: I've kissed babies everywhere from New Mexico to Florida!
Moved On: Grrr, I hate that pinko liberal group!
Talked To Someone: Duh!
Had A Serious Talk: You bet.
Missed Someone: Nope!
Hugged Someone: Yes.
Kissed Someone: Tee hee!
Fought With Your Parents: No. :(
Dreamed About Someone You Can't Be With: George just told me I'm a sexy bitch and I could have whoever I want!
Current Mood: Happy

6th October 2004

1:06pm: Cross
Dear me, it has been a long time since I have written! I forsook my LiveJournal for a pen-and-paper journal I have been keeping in the bedchambers. Also, Karl advised me that it might be a breach of security for me to continue publishing my thoughts on my husband and about our family.

Things at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. have been hectic as of late. The debates have taken their toll on my husband. As we watched Dick and John Edwards debate last night, George kept muttering. I think he is jealous of his Vice President's ability to form complex sentences. Poor George, it's not his fault! He is really quite a sweet man, and -- let's be honest -- have we ever had a president who looked so hot in a cowboy hat?

Poland's decision to withdraw from the liberation of Iraq has been on George's mind recently, especially after Kerry slighted Poland by neglecting to mention them in the debates last week. Personally, I think Poland was offended at Kerry's gaffe and withdrew based on this slight. How incredibly tacky of Poland that was, don't you think?

Word around the house is that George's job is secure and that horrible Frankenstein Democrat doesn't have a chance. I've presumptively ordered new table linings for four more seasons. They were expensive, but I really think the alligator-skin tablecloth is quite tasteful! It is a dark green and has been flecked with gold; it really brings out the ambiance of the cherry furniture. I spoke to the designer about having the Presidential seal embossed or pressed in with dyed eagle feathers, but he said that would take another four weeks. I'm still not sure whether I want to wait that long!

Condoleezza and I had the most wonderful heart-to-heart the other night. She is such a wonderful woman! I can't imagine what it would have been like as Clinton's wife, with Bill boffing every intern and smoking his cigars and with only Janet Reno to talk to! How horrid!

There has been no news from Jenna and Barbara recently, which I suppose is a good thing. Those two, they are so precious and precocious, not like the children of that horrible smirking John Edwards!
Current Mood: happy

7th August 2003

10:48pm: Hello!
Hello, everyone!

Today George went to Texas to visit with Colin Powell. George, Colin and Dick Armitage discussed peace actions in Liberia; George was adamant that Charles Taylor cede power before peacekeeping troops would enter into Liberian territory to dispense medical and food assistance. I think this is an absolute necessity; if we are to promote peace in Liberia, the dictator which has relegated the country to civil strife must first cede power. Otherwise our troops are doomed to encounter unnecessary resistance from the Liberian people which would undoubtedly result in further loss of life and increased military expenditure. I know that George has been passing through several bills and items of legislature to increase defense spending, but this has not been unilaterally met with welcome arms by the Democrats who argue that the White House is home to at least one warmonger. Frankly, I am appalled at these claims and resent the implication they carry, but I can understand how the War on Terror sent overtones throughout George's administration.
I wish that we didn't have to enter into so many military conflicts, but with the state of the world as it is today it is absolutely vital to pretect our natural fluids and resources from enemy invasion and subversion. Chemical attack on America's aquifers or biological attack over a major city has been a threat from several Middle Eastern countries, and we must work to squelch this threat to ensure a standard of living and a high quality of life for all taxpaying American citizens. If the threat of terror were to loom over our heads, our economy would not be where it is today. In any case, Charles Taylor of Liberia is as much a terrorist as Osama bin Laden or Timothy McVeigh. He may not bring terror to the United States, but it is evident that his reign has brought terror to Liberia -- a terror we must work to remore and rectify.

I truly wish I could be in Texas with George. He mentioned that he and Colin were about to "go brand some cows;" that reminds me of growing up on the ranch. It would be wonderful to reminisce about the old stead! Unfortunately I am tied into giving speeches on education around the Maryland area. Each time I speak to a child, I love seeing the spark of recognition in their eyes -- someday, these will be the future lawyers and politicians and presidents of America!
Current Mood: happy

1st August 2003

1:25am: Hello again today!
Hello, Readers from Virginia to Texas to Idaho! I welcome you to the second installment of my LiveJournal.
I was surprised to see such a turnout after my very first entry. I am excited about the prospects of the continued success of this journal!

The computers in the White House are all extremely sleek and up-to-date, but as I write I was reminded of a puerile prank played by the exiting Democrats after George's election. When Clinton's staff left, they removed the "W" key from all the keyboards. How silly! We had to buy new keyboards for the entire building to rectify their prank. I am sure that George will win the 2004 elections; he already surpasses the Democratic fundrasing committee by a two-to-one margin in monies raised. With the way that things are going, this country needs a strong, moral Republican in office for at least another four years.

Some people blame George for the foreign affairs and domestic economic crises currently bothering America. Really, George can't be blamed for these; it's a natural cycle, and George is simply coincidentally helming the White House at the moment. In another four years, I predict a wholesome and healed America. Pat Buchanan is proposing a Constitutional amendment which would sanctify and define the institution of marriage as a union between a man and a woman. I feel this would bode well for restoring the moral fiber of America. I mean no offense to our more liberal constituents, but the Bible does indicate that it is an abominantion for same-sex unions to be condoned. Since the Bible is truly the only impeccable account of morality that we have today, it should be in our best interest to follow the Word and Teachings of God and His Son.

That said, though, I am pleased to announce that Israel's Prime Minister, Arial Sharon, visited the White House today for the eigth time thus far. George was happy to declare the friendship between them strong and the bond between America and Israel abiding. I know that all George wants is for America to live in peace; he expressed his interest that Israel and Palestine reconcile their differences and coexist in harmony. Personally, I see no difference why the two countries must persist in struggle. If things become bad enough, it may be worth lobbying the United Nations for assistance.

But enough of politics. I wish every one of you a lovely day in this lovely country!
Current Mood: Happy

31st July 2003

1:58am: Hello!
Hello! This is my first entry, and so I don't know what to write about. Since I am but a voice for the public, I think I will let you decide what goes in this entry.

Today my husband expressed his interest in going back to Texas. I think that when this whole Iraq and Liberia thing is over, we could use some ranch time. It's been so long since I visited Barbara and Jenna! I think I'll cook them a hearty Texas pot roast.

George said today that situations in Iraq are growing more peaceful. I'm glad to hear this because I've heard so much about all the poor American soldiers killed since the fighting in Iraq stopped three months ago. I sure am happy that Jessica Lynch made it home, though; even though her wounds were only caused by the traffic accident, she could have been tortured by the Iraqi soldiers! Those Iraqis are so inhumane. I do try and support our war in the Middle East, but sometimes I have to confess that I find it difficult. Sometimes George brings his politics into the bedchambers and I have to try to understand what he's saying. Sometimes he gets so excited!

I would like to thank all my friends at LiveJournal. I know that you will help make this community a better place!

Love,
Laura
Current Mood: happy
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